"Teachings and actions must square with each other."
--Dwight Eisenhower, on character in leadership
Revised Apr 2007
Growing Families International [GFI] has been controversial within the Christian church for a long time. With the publication of Babywise, the Ezzos extended their controversial method into the secular world.
To illustrate that the present-day controversy is the consequence of Ezzo's own repeating patterns of behavior and advice. Concerns about medical misinformation and of a propensity to circulate rumors and lies about critics and associates have dogged the Ezzos almost from the beginning of their ministry. Accountability structures were unable to fulfill their roles as the Ezzos dropped out of accountability relationships when called to account.
To assist parents and church leaders in evaluating whether Gary Ezzo is qualified to provide leadership in parenting and calling families to high moral standards.
Corrections and additions may be directed to Kathy Thile
GFI---Growing Families International, The Ezzos' for-profit company
CRI---Christian Research Institute, a leading Christian cult research and apologetics teaching organization
GCC---Grace Community Church, the large California church pastored by Dr. John MacArthur where Ezzo was employed and from which he launched GFI. GFI materials which tout Ezzo's 10 years as "Pastor of Family Ministries" are referring to his position at GCC.
LHEF---Living Hope Evangelical Fellowship, Ezzo's place of worship after leaving GCC, pastored by Ezzo's friend and former GFI staff member Dave Maddox.
CT---Christianity Today, a well-respected monthly news and features magazine
GKGW--"Growing Kids God's Way", the centerpiece of the Ezzos' parenting curriculum, includes a manual and audio or videotapes, usually studied in weekly church classes for 18 weeks.
The Timeline
Part One 1966-1998
(Note: for clarity, some listings have been grouped by topic rather than by date)
Not much is known about Ezzo's early life or employment background before the late 70's. On a GKGW (2nd ed.) teaching tape Ezzo refers to having some kind of farming or sheepherding background.
Fall of 1966 - Summer of 1969 -- Gary Ezzo took several classes at Mohawk Valley Community College but did not get an AA degree.
1974 - 1977 - Approximate time of Anne Marie Ezzo's employment as an RN at Concord Hospital. Concord Hospital could not verify GFI's claim that Anne Marie Ezzo's work experience included pediatric nursing.
Source: More Than A Parenting Ministry footnote #57, CRI Vol 20/Number 4 1998 April-June
Note: updated ministry bios on GFI's US website have dropped the claim that Anne Marie Ezzo has a background in pediatric nursing.
Ezzo and his church in New Hampshire
By late 1979 -- Ezzo was considered to be one of the leaders/elders of His Vantage Point Church in Laconia, NH (This church came to be known as Lakes Region Bible Church.)
1980/1981 -- Ezzo became pastor-teacher of this church
1982 or 1983 -- Ezzo was asked to step down
from leadership in this church amid complaints of authoritarianism,
exclusivism and divisiveness.
Sources:More
Than a Parenting Ministry, Christian Research Journal
Vol 20/Number 4 1998 April-June and A
Matter of Bias?, Christian Research Journal Vol
21/Number 2
Ezzo in California
Ezzo and his family--wife Anne Marie and two daughters--moved from New Hampshire to Southern California.
1983 – Ezzo entered Talbot School of Theology full time to pursue a Master of Arts in Ministry degree in a program designed for candidates with ministry experience in lieu of a bachelor's degree.
1984 – The Ezzos started teaching parenting classes at Grace Community Church in Sun Valley CA.
1985 – In the course of accepting a staff pastor position at GCC, Ezzo filled out an employment application, listing a degree
he did not earn (the AA), and even specifying a major and a grade point
average. In 2000, an embattled Ezzo justified his action saying it, "suited the purpose
for which the information was being requested which was
simply establishing an educational benchmark for 1985."
Sources: "Unprepared
to Teach Parenting", Christianity Today, November
13, 2000; GFI ministry letter on file, dated 2001.
Circa 1985 -- Anne Marie Ezzo authored and circulated a 4-page paper titled "Parent
Controlled Feeding". It included "a sample time table for feeding during the first four weeks" which laid out feedings at 4 hour intervals, and urged parents to consider formula supplements if the baby, by three weeks of age, couldn't last three or four hours on mother's milk alone.
Source: Document on file
1985 -- Ezzo graduated from Talbot with a Master of Arts in Ministry
1986 -- GKGW videos first distributed
1987 -- The Ezzos formed GFI as a nonprofit corporation along with five other Grace Community Church couples.
1989 -- The nonprofit corporation was dissolved and GFI became a for-profit corporation
1989 -- The version of Preparation for Parenting that was circulating at this time fired salvos at demand feeding (the practice endorsed by the American Academy of Pediatrics), and at mothers who respond to their babies' cries, calling these practices incompatible with scripture, practiced by an "extreme fringe," primitivistic, humanistic, based in evolution, emotional, idolatrous, unhealthful, harmful to marriage, and the cause of health and developmental problems. By three weeks, the baby was to be feeding only every three to four hours, with formula supplementation as necessary to achieve those intervals. The baby was to be sleeping through the night by six weeks, enforced by letting the baby cry, if necessary.
Source: quotes on file from Preparation for Parenting c 1989
1990 -- Ezzo's "Growing Kids
God's Way" radio broadcast began and by '91 it was going
out on multiple stations. In January '92 Ezzo claimed
it would be on over 100 stations nationwide by April of
92.
Source: Letter from Gary Ezzo on file
1990 – The 3rd edition of Preparation for Parenting: A Biblical Perspective was self-published and taught that spacing feedings 3 to 4 hours apart would cultivate self-control and counter-act the baby's desire for immediate gratification:
The mother would feed the baby
or more than every four"
and the book confidently assured parents that the baby's hunger patterns "will begin to line up" with the scheduled mealtimes. If not, the use of infant formula was recommended in order to stay with the plan.
"If toward the end of week three you find your baby is fussy after feeding, not going three to four hours on breast milk, and you begin to question your milk supply, there is a three-day test you may want to try. After nursing your baby, offer him a complementary feeding of one or two ounces of formula. After each feeding, express your milk, keeping track of how much extra you are producing. After three days, if you see that your milk supply has increased...then return to just breastfeeding.
If your milk supply has not significantly increased, that is strong indication that you are not able to keep up with the demands of your little one. If that is the case, do not nurse more often. Stay with the plan and continue with the complementary feeding for the benefit of your baby and your own peace of mind."
--Preparation for Parenting, c 1990, p. 92
By 8 weeks, according to the 3rd edition, the baby would
sleep through the night and have 5-6 feedings daily.
A table shows 4-5 feedings
as the average number of feedings 8 week old babies received according to come from an informal follow-up survey of users.
View more quotes from Preparation for Parenting, 3rd Edition
1992 -- Eric Abel was GFI's Director of Ministries.
The Abels were also among the five couples who originally
co-founded GFI with the Ezzos. He resigned in September
of 1994 due to unresolved concerns about Gary Ezzo's integrity
and lack of accountability.
Source: A
Matter of Bias, Christian Research Journal Summer
1998 issue.
1992 – Dr.
Robert Bucknam, who received co-author credit on Babywise in 1993, was in a pediatric residency
program at Children's Hospital in L.A.
Source: Medic Data
1993 – 1st edition of Babywise was self-published by GFI. This edition was nearly identical to Prep for Parenting which Dr. Bucknam did not co-author. Explicit religious language was removed, and Dr. Bucknam added a foreword, praising the earlier Ezzo material which had so impressed him, and denigrating the "instincts" which had left him and his wife high and dry, and feeding their son every two hours.
"Soon after the birth of our first son, we quickly found our enthusiasm and confidence turned into exhaustion and frustration. Mom was up three times at night and the baby was cranky during the day. The unsolicited advice typically offered was to feed the baby more often since he was obviously hungry. We did feed him, around the clock, every two hours. So much for instincts." (p.11)
For babies from 0-8 weeks of age, the book recommended 3 to 4 hour feedings:
[emphasis theirs]
Note: The end-to-beginning measurement of feeding intervals instituted in this edition gives the false impression that feeding intervals were changed from previous editions whose 3-4 hour intervals had come under criticism.
This edition noted a side benefit of fewer feedings--it leaves you with fewer diapers to change!
Note: fewer wet and soiled diapers indicates less intake.
August 16, 1993—Christianity Today published first national article voicing concerns: The Brave New Baby by Thomas S. Giles
Summary of article: the growing popularity of Preparation for Parenting is noted along with associated reports of infants with low weight gain and emotional withdrawal. The concerns of various health care professionals were noted. Various church leaders express concerns over dogmatism and their opinion that the program needs modification. Ezzo insists GFI should not be held responsible for these or other health problems, but admitts that he didn't consult any lactation experts or other health-care professionals in writing his manual.
August 20, 1993 - GFI responds to this article by sending a letter and response sheet to their supporters. They accused Christianity Today's reporter of deliberately misleading the public. They claimed that 92% of mothers using the program breastfeed and more than 99% of the babies on the program sleep through the night by 8 weeks, linking these outcomes to use of the material, while doubting that the negative experiences documented by the reporter could be connected to use of the material. They opined that even if there were a hundred babies who had failed to gain weight adequately, it would be statistically insignificant in comparison to the success stories.
Source: Ezzo's August 20, 1993 letter and response sheet on file
Fall 1993 – 4th edition of Preparation for
Parenting published
Source: Ezzo's statement in "The Brave New Baby", Christianity Today
September 1994 — Eric Abel resigned as GFI's Director of Ministries over concerns "about the integrity of the company and its leadership." Abel remained at GFI in a different capacity through February of 1996 while seeking other employment. During this period he and his wife Julie removed themselves from their public role with the company because of their integrity concerns.
Sources: Abel Family Public Statement & Eric Abel, email on file, 5.19.06
Ezzo and Grace Community Church
Spring 1993 -- Grace Community Church elders
"asked Gary Ezzo to be more accountable to them"
Source:
Oct '97 GCC
Elders' Statement Regarding Gary Ezzo and Growing Families
International
June 1993 -- Ezzo announced plans to resign from the pastoral staff at GCC but to continue as a lay elder.
Mid-1995 — GCC's pastoral staff met with
Gary to discuss concerns about doctrinal and biblical
content of GFI materials. Gary "promised to make
changes in his material to alleviate everyone's concerns." The promised changes were never
submitted to the pastoral staff. Instead, Gary resigned
as an elder and withdrew from GCC completely.
Source
GCC
Statement Regarding Gary Ezzo and GFI
July 18, 1995 — Gary's pastor at GCC, Dr. John MacArthur, wrote to Gary upon Gary's resignation from the elder board to summarize and "put to rest" an apparently unfruitful discussion concerning GCC's decision to drop GFI materials and remove them from the church's bookstore. MacArthur expressed his affection for the Ezzos but noted his dissatisfaction with Gary's behavior:
Source: letter dated July 18, 1995 from John MacArthur to Gary Ezzo, provided by GFI
July 8, 1995 — Gary posted on an America Online Ezzo method message board located in a Christian discussion area:
Wow, talk about women and emotions. (I read all the responses.) I feel like I walked into the hen house during egg laying..."
"...I do have other more important activities to fill up my day, than the go nowhere debates with emotionally charged demand feeding mothers talking about demand feeding practices."1995 -- Babywise published by Multnomah.
March 1996 - Eric and Julie Abels, former co-founders of GFI, ended all remaining ties with GFI.
Sources: Abel Family Public Statement & Eric Abel, email on file, 5.19.06
May 14, 1996 – "Religious Parenting Programs–Their Relationship to Child Abuse Prevention" The Child Abuse Council of Orange County appointed a religious task force to evaluate GKGW following complaints by health care professionals about dehydration, slow growth and development and failure to thrive they'd observed among babies of parents using Ezzo programs. Examples of findings:
"I am uncomfortable with the Ezzos approach
to
this topic for two primary reasons. I feel they
have a point
to make and choose numerous "proof texts"
from Scripture
to make their point, not the broader teaching
of Scripture. Secondly,
I sense they claim to have a corner on the truth,
making anyone
with a differing perspective suspect.....without
juding their
motives, it appears that the Preparation for Parenting
material
reflects the Ezzos' perspective on infant feeding
rather than
a theologically accurate or balanced view of parenting."
--Doug Haag, Associate Pastor of Family Ministries,
EV Free Church of Fullerton, CA
"The issues of control and authority seem to override the elements of compassion, child advocacy, and real developmental needs in "Preparation for Parenting". --Margie Deutsch, M.S. in Early Childhood Development, IBCLC
Ezzo and World Magazine
May 25/June 1, 1996 -- WORLD Magazine published The Ezzos Know Best, subtitled "Controversial Parenting Curriculum is Sweeping the Church"
Summary of article: Description of the attraction of the program to Christian parents and of praise and concerns offered up by various people and organizations.
After this article was published, Ezzo pressured WORLD to retract statements in the article.
He "sent letters to World editor Marvin
Olasky suggesting the magazine consider asking for Maynard's
resignation. He asked Maynard's church elders to take
disciplinary action against him."
Source: "Unprepared
to Teach Parenting" Christianity Today
In fact, Ezzo wrote up two 'markedly different' versions of the 'verbatim' interview transcript. The second version was noticed on GFI's website by Dr. Steve Rein, a Christian father and statistician who collected articles about the Ezzos' materials on a website (and owner of Ezzo.info.) Ezzo attempted to press criminal charges against Rein for "hacking." Authorities investigated and concluded that the complaint was unfounded. No charges were filed.
Ezzo later sent a ministry response letter to GFI supporters telling them he had "heard" that Dr. Rein had lost his position over this, adding, "we have no reason to doubt that."
The fact that Ezzo supporters closely connected to the Ezzos are still [in 2008] circulating this gossip necessitates the response that Dr. Rein did indeed take a position at another university at the close of the school term, but his departure was completely unrelated to the incident involving Gary Ezzo. He accepted the offer of an advantageous position in California, closer to his extended family. He left on good terms with his former university and continued to do work for them from a distance for a period of time after his departure.
Sources: "Unprepared
to Teach Parenting", Christianity Today; GFI extended response document on file; and correpondence on file from Dr. Steve Rein
July 1996 -- WORLD's writer Roy Maynard issued a personal response, calling the "verbatim" transcript inaccurate and "threaded together in such a way as to distort my words, views, and journalistic methods."
WORLD eventually (April 1997) offered a mild apology in "We Could Have Done Better," but reiterated that it stood by the fairness of the article and their journalist.
GFI's Spring 1997 newsletter
devoted a full page to publicizing and praising WORLD's apology.
Source: "Gary Ezzo's thoughts on
World Magazine", The Community Perspective, GFI, Vol.2
No.1
Later, Ezzo would again use WORLD's mild apology to dismiss the whole affair.
"Does it seem strange to you, the reader, that all of the terrible things cited by Mrs. Terner could have taken place with Roy Maynard or World Magazine and yet, few months later [sic], World Magazine publishes an apology to GFI."
--Ezzo's extended response to Unprepared for Parenting (on file)
July 11 1996 -- ABC World News Tonight television featured a report on Ezzo's method, by religion reporter Peggy Wehmayer, herself a Christian.
July 1996 -- GFI published a response on its website denouncing the report as part of the media's "War Against Moral Truth" but did not address the issues brought up in the report itself.
Ezzo sent back a photocopy of their letter with terse comments jotted in the margin.
The Kuhlmanns
replied that perhaps there had been a mix-up in GFI's correspondence
department. Ezzo sent another photocopy of their letter
with a Post-it note saying their letter was "so badly flawed in its assertions that any
other type of response is rendered useless...."
Source: Kuhlmann/Ezzo correspondence
Ezzo and Grace Community Church cont'd
August 22, 1996 -- Gary sent
an email to a donor to the radio ministry of GCC, the church where Gary had pastored for 10 years, containing false
information about his former employer and place of
worship. GCC's concern mounted when these same rumors
began coming back to them from around the world. It
appeared, said GCC elder Philip Johnson, that Ezzo
was conducting a "private smear campaign."
Source: Questions About Growing Families International, Grace Church and Gary Ezzo
But
the most perfidious way to rob another
human
being is to steal their good reputation....the
one who
steals another man's good reputation by
slanderous
gossip can never pay back what he has
taken."
--GKGW ed 4, p 245
September 1, 1996 -- Dr. John MacArthur, senior
pastor at GCC, corrected the
false information and warned Gary to set the record
straight immediately -- wherever and to whomever he
had spread the false information.
Source: Questions
About Growing Families International, Grace Church and
Gary Ezzo
September 17,
1996 -- Gary sent an apology to MacArthur and
to the donor. GFI later claimed that "Gary's error
was not in the veracity of the facts shared, but in the
amount of information communicated."
Source: GFI response document
Oct 1996-- Ezzo published "Growing Kids God's Way--Why it's Right" , a lengthy article written to express strenous objections to the "purposeful distortions" contained in an article by Rebecca Prewett, a Christian woman whom he characterized as deceptive and untrustworthy by reason of her former connection with La Leche League International (a breastfeeding support organization.)
After introductory comments, the article offers 3 short paragraphs of positive things about the classes and the organization including a startling claim:
One of the most notable highlights of this program is the Ezzos' advanced research on healthy infant nighttime sleep.
It did not, however, expand on the nature of the "advanced research." and the Ezzos have not ever published this research if it does exist.
The remaining several pages of the article are largely devoted to casting doubt on the integrity of the author of the article.
Early 1997—Eric and Julie Abel (former
GFI Director of Ministries) requested to be removed
from GFI materials (e.g. teaching videos) in order to
complete their disassociation from GFI.
Source: Abel Family
Website
January 12, 1997—Conservative Christian parenting ministry Focus on the Family said rigid adherence to the GFI materials could result in child abuse but tactfully concluded that "whether to use or not to use the Ezzos' material remains, in the final analysis, a judgment call."
By late
1997 this
statement was strengthened
to say Focus does "not recommend" the material.
Babywise credits no one as the book's primary lactation expert. Bucknam says he was not at liberty to give her name. "But, yes, she is certified and highly regarded in her area of expertise," he adds. ...Bucknam also says that University of Virginia and University of Arizona research, soon to be published in major medical journals, will support Babywise's principles. (When asked twice, Bucknam would not divulge the names of the principal researchers or the journals where this research will be published.)
Note: the research never appeared.
Ezzo: We have chased
down enough of the supposed cases of low weight
gain only to find out they had nothing to do with
feeding a baby every three hours on our program.
Many of the so-called concerns are more fabricated
and exaggerated than real.
Herald: Some critics say you are not qualified
to give such advice regarding infant feeding. What
are your qualifications as well as those of Anne
Marie Ezzo? When you say Anne Marie has a "background
in pediatric nursing," what specifically do
you mean? (i.e. education, where employed, and when,
etc.)
Ezzo: Again, who are the critics? What are
their families like? Are they sought after by young
parents as role models to be emulated?
March to October 1997-- Christian education expert Dr. Kent McClain and a committee from his former church in Arizona conducted a review of GKGW. The process included reading the GKGW materials and viewing the teaching videos and comparing them with other parenting materials. Dr. McClain spoke with Gary Ezzo by phone and set up a meeting. When McClain got to LA, Ezzo "cancelled the pre-arranged meeting."
The critique offered 4 areas of concern:1) Missing Biblical Cornerstones
The program, which purports to be God's plan for raising children, fails to cover essential biblical teachings such as: the knowledge of redemption/salvation, how to walk by faith, the exercise of prayer, family devotions, etc.
2) Mishandling of Scripture--Fact vs. Opinion
It is difficult to distinguish between the Ezzos' opinions, actual fact, and biblical principle. They periodically create the impression that their own ideas of parenting are Scriptural or moral, when they may not be.
3) Presence of Legalism
The program has a tendency of making parenting applications more significant than the biblical context allows. The material routinely moralizes parenting suggestions, forcing them to become decisions of right and wrong.
4)Questionable Views of Child Development
The materials display a questionable understanding of child development. Many of the discipline suggestions are not age appropriate.
Note: Dr. McClain updated the critique in 2001: click here for the web version.
Download the PDF version here.
Ezzo and Grace Community Church, cont'd
October 16, 1997— Grace Community Church issued a public statement "A Statement Regarding Gary Ezzo and Growing Families International" to explain why GCC is no longer affiliated with Gary Ezzo and GFI and why they no longer use or endorse GFI materials. The document mentioned the elders found no biblical justification for various teachings Ezzo portrayed as biblical, and noted concerns with the way Ezzo had handled criticism.
Gary Ezzo has declined to listen to concerns from essentially friendly critics--including fellow elders, pastors, and even co-workers in the GFI ministries. His responses to the elders of Grace Church have reflected a repeated tendency to avoid accountability....In at least one case he assured a group of concerned elders that he would seek resolution of a long- standing conflict--then later refused to do so. His departure from Grace Church left a disturbing number of conflicts unresolved and concerns unaddressed.
At the same time, Gary has been known to respond with exaggerated and even false accusations against his critics. [Emphasis added]
November 11, 1997— The Final GFI response to Grace Statement disputed -- at great length -- points such as the dates of meetings and whether the GCC elders had pursued resolution aggressively enough. It was "reviewed" and "approved" by elders at Living Hope Evangelical Fellowship. It was originally available GFI's website. View here.
December 11, 1997— GCC elder Phil Johnson who framed GCC's statement responded to common questions about the situation in "Questions about GFI, Grace Church, and Gary Ezzo"
Feb 1998 — GFI called on Ken Sande of Peacemaker Ministries to assist in reconciliation meetings with GCC elders.
March 20, 1998 —The reconciliation meetings
resulted in a revised statement by GCC elders "A
Statement Regarding Gary Ezzo and Growing Families
International"
In a comment
on this revised statement, GCC elder Phil Johnson
stated that during the meetings Ezzo indicated a desire
to rectify character-related issues mentioned in the
original
statement, so in good faith GCC agreed to retract
their earlier statement in favor of a briefer, vaguer
statement.
May 13, 1998 — Ezzo made use of this milder statement to minimize to his followers the seriousness of GCC's concerns. He claimed his organization
had submitted to Ken Sande's suggestions for improvement,
and alluded to unresolved issues saying, "there
are some issues only heaven can sort out."
Source: "Grace Church /GFI Ministry statement" originally published on GFI's website.
Specifically, we reported that he had shown a pattern of resisting accountability, and that he was not always truthful. (We had become aware of several instances in which Mr. Ezzo twisted the truth, ranging from a false claim that he held a degree he had never really earned, to the spreading of false reports about our church in a manner that appeared to be deliberately divisive.)
Mr. Ezzo subsequently met with one of our elders and expressed a desire to rectify our major concerns about his character. He assured us that he was making himself accountable to a group of men he trusted--the pastor and elders of Living Hope Evangelical Fellowship (LHEF).
In the
interest of seeking peace, we issued a revised and
abbreviated version of our public statement. In
that revised statement, the concerns we had raised
about Mr. Ezzo's integrity and accountability were
no longer expressly mentioned, pending further action
on Mr. Ezzo's part to mitigate or allay those concerns.
After the revised statement was issued, however,
Mr. Ezzo made no further attempt to address the
larger concerns we had raised about his personal
character.
We have nonetheless been able to verify that LHEF's discipline of Mr. Ezzo involves the very same issues we raised in our initial public statement: Gary Ezzo's lack of truthfulness and his refusal to be held accountable. It is not without significance that the men who have excommunicated him are the same men to whom he claimed to be making himself accountable. This has clearly become a pattern of behavior with Mr. Ezzo. LHEF is at least the third church Mr. Ezzo has left with questions pending about his character.
